Teaching Yoga


When my friends learned that I was searching for a yoga teacher training program, they assumed I wanted to become a yoga teacher. I did not. I wanted to deepen my own yoga practice. I wanted to learn about the Sutras and the Gita, ancient yogic texts. What I didn’t realize, though, was that I would have to teach in my training. As students, we were supposed to teach, if I recall correctly, at least six community classes. For some reason, my teacher thought I was going to be an “amazing” (her words) yoga teacher. She told me I would get a following. She had me sub for her during my training, something most trainees don’t do.

I never enjoyed teaching. I was very nervous and insecure. I know some my fellow classmates felt the same. I reached out to experienced teachers for advice. I learned they too recalled feeling similarly as they began teaching. One or two even admitted they would take something to calm their nerves before teaching.

I felt I didn’t know enough to stand in front of a class and tell them what to do. I was scared someone was going to get injured in my class. I prayed, I sought the help of energy workers and spiritual coaching to help calm my nerves. I even had a session with a hypnotherapist. I often had to sub classes and I swear I could hear people’s voices saying “Oh shit, a sub! Ugh, I want to leave!” I did approach a few students after class to find out if they were thinking that. Why yes, they were. I don’t know if it’s because I’m a Reiki practitioner and am quite sensitive to feelings but I hated it. OK, I didn’t always hate it. I did teach a few series where I had the same four or six students every week. I knew them and they knew me. I got to know their bodies. I integrated yoga with Reiki. I did enjoy those classes. I felt I was serving these students to the best of my ability.

Even though I was nervous, I kept on teaching. I would say yes to most opportunities to teach. I approached yoga studios about getting on their schedule. It was a struggle since there are many yoga teachers in my hood. I even looked into renting my own space to teach a class after teaching six students in my living room for weeks.

And  yet…..

It wasn’t until I returned home from my trip to India last Fall that I realized, hello, I did not have to teach adults! Apparently some of my friends had given me that advice but I never heard them. Once I decided to devote my teaching to children, it was as if I had lost weight. I felt much lighter and freer.

I don’t always feel light and free when I teach kids. It’s challenging work. I don’t walk around a room teaching and demonstrating a few poses. I’m on the floor with them doing frog jumps and donkey kicks. I try to maintain their attention and focus. I’m constantly scouring blog posts and websites, taking trainings, buying books and props to use in my classes. However, I generally don’t get anxious and nervous as I used to when I was teaching adults. I do feel some anxiety before teaching at a new school or center, but it’s really not the same.

Yesterday, I read an article titled Memo to New Teachers: Be Patient. I thought the article was good until I came to the end when the author wrote “The world is full of great artists who never came to be because of a fear of being bad before they were good.” That sentenced took my breath away. Was he talking to me? Had I let fear win?  Or, was I simply following my dharma?

In my case, I believe my skills and gifts are best served teaching children. Who knows. Maybe if I had continued teaching adults, I would have overcome my nerves and anxiety. I also believe life is too short and there are many great yoga teachers. Once I made the decision not to teach adults, I wondered if I would change my mind. It’s been over one year, though, and my mind hasn’t changed. Will it ever?

Fellow yoga teachers, how did you feel as you began teaching?  Have those feelings changed the more you teach? Yoga practitioners, do you know or sense when a teacher is a new teacher or if she/he is nervous or anxious about teaching?


I’m A Bad, Bad Yogi

I’ve always felt that having a home asana practice was very important. Yet, I can’t seem to motivate myself to practice at home. I have a ton of excuses. I don’t have a sacred space. I prefer practicing in a studio, feeling the energy, being surrounded by other yogis. I prefer being told what to do.

Despite these “valid” excuses, I still beat myself up for not practicing at home. I do meditate (well, on most days). I pray. I practice ahimsa to the best of my ability (except those times when I scream at my kids and then beat myself up for doing so). I even took a workshop on cultivating a home practice. That lasted about a day. I am a Yoga Alliance Certified Yoga Teacher for Krishna’s sakes! I should have a home practice.

This morning I couldn’t make one of my favorite classes because I was observing and assisting kids yoga classes in another town. I could have practiced at home but I didn’t feel like it. I tried to show compassion to myself. Maybe I  just need to accept the fact that I don’t like practicing at home instead of feeling like shit about it?

When I later logged onto Facebook, I saw a blog post on Yoga Journal that said “a new study finds that having a regular home yoga practice is a better predictor of health —and of a healthful lifestyle—than how many classes you might attend at a studio or for how long you practice.” Dozens and dozens of commenters posted how much they enjoy practicing at home. I was one of the lone who voiced their preference to practice at a studio. Shit, even a friend posted that she loves her home practice. I wonder if she saw my post?? She was probably too busy practicing her ujjayi breathing and engaging her mula bandha to notice.

Maybe one day I will be one of those extolling the joys of a home asana practice. In the meantime, I’ll see you at class. Namaste.

She Works Hard For Her Money

When I was about 11 or 12, Donna Summer’s song, She Works Hard For Her Money, was released. I loved this album and listened to it often. Little did I know that nearly 30 years later, this song would be my theme song.

OK, not quite but close. Yesterday, I read a piece written by someone who struggled with making a living from teaching yoga. I assume that the writer was being witty and sarcastic but this sentence stood out (among others): “I envied my yoga teachers, who seemed to be these rich, serene deities who lived in pajamas and had legions of followers.” 

One of my favorite yoga blogs, YogaDork, also featured the piece on their blog. I loved the comments.

I’m not going to focus on the tone of the article, if she went into teaching yoga for the right reasons, if she forgot about the spiritual aspect of yoga and teaching. No, I want to focus on the money. Do people really think that teaching yoga is lucrative? I never, ever once thought that. Who are these people who think this way?  Continue reading

Finding My Voice

A few weeks ago, one of my  students asked me if all yoga teachers included spiritual aspects in their classes.  She continued to say that she really enjoyed the spiritual aspect of my class. Her question made me take a step back for a second. I would never call myself a “spiritual teacher” but the fact is that I cannot help but share my learnings with my students. I have studied many different types of meditation. I am a Reiki practitioner, I have studied and practiced different types of energy work, the Law of Attraction…for years and years. I remember reading the Power of Positive Thinking when I was 12 or 13 years old.

This conversation made me think of when I spoke with a Coach who helps yoga teachers brand themselves in the Fall. She came recommended to me by a yoga studio owner.  When we chatted, she asked me what types of classes I liked to teach and my style. We both came to the conclusion that it wasn’t the best time for me to use her services. How could I even think of branding myself when I was a new teacher?  Continue reading

I’m Going To India!

I’ve felt a calling to visit India for a very long time. I’m turning 40 this year and felt I had the perfect reason to make such a trip. Every chance I get, I set the intention that I would make the trip this year. I want to visit the birthplace of yoga!

However, I had no idea what area to visit or where to begin planning such a trip. I’m not so great at these things. I turned to Facebook for help. I posted on my status and a few other FB groups with the hope that someone would help me. Friends did connect me with others but nothing panned out. I quickly began to feel frustrated (patience is something that I am working on). I was reminded of my experience a year ago when I was searching for a yoga teacher training program.

I kept on reminding myself to enjoy this part. That I needed to relax and have fun. That soon enough, I would find a tour, that soon enough I would be in India and back and wish I was still waiting to go.

A few days ago, I decided to chant to my man Ganesha. The next day,  Continue reading

On My Toes

I had a funny experience at yoga class today.  I was very excited to take the 11:15 vinyasa flow class at Shakti Yoga. Between teaching classes and writing articles (check out my latest piece), I haven’t been taking as many classes as I’d like.

The director greeted me as I entered the studio. “Are you taking class this morning?”  Yes I am! At least I thought so.

Turns out that  Continue reading